untitled...

Today is Friday... I went to Partyworld for Karaoke with my frens... There are Usun, Alvin, Mely, Janet, Kiat, Audry and Ching Rou... The 8 of us are crazy... Maybe the 1st time when we stepped into the room, we don't feel high... High as mean excited... So we just sing some song... When it came to a song " Because of You" we started to get high and we sang so loudly even without the mic... Gosh... I just cant bear myself not to sing with them... When we are going up to Partyworld, my fren said this to me : " I know something happen from ur face lar... So later just go and put it out..." So, when I was in the room, I tried my best not to think bout the problems and keep singing... I dun care wad people think bout my voice... I know I dont have nice voice to sing... I dont know how to sing... Maybe my singing like shit... I just dont care... All I wanna do is be myself... Sometimes, I just need to get drunk to be myself... But since I have stop drinking... I need to use other things to make myself happy... Hahaha... I duno... Maybe people think I am crazy... But, that's me... I am who I am... I am not as good as my sis... I am not as pretty as my sis... I am not as good girl as my bro... I am stubborn... I am talkative... I am lack of smile... And if u cant take the real me, then stay far from me... I dont need u since u dont need me... Maybe for most people, being the real them is easy but for me, I cant... It's not easy for me... I always be someone that I dont know... Someone that others want me to be... I am an actress in my own world... In my own life... I cant even be the producer, the writer, the main role in my own scenario... I don't know why... Sometimes, just sometimes, I really wanna be myself... No matter infront of who... Even infront of the president... So, let me be myself!!!!